Thursday, September 30, 2010

Actor Tony Curtis Dies At Los Vegas Area Home

HENDERSON, Nev. – Tony Curtis shaped himself from a 1950s movie heartthrob
into a respected actor, showing a determined streak that served him well in
such films as "Sweet Smell of Success," "The Defiant Ones" and "Some Like It
Hot."

The Oscar-nominated actor died Wednesday evening of cardiac arrest at home
in the Las Vegas-area city of Henderson, Clark County Coroner Mike Murphy
said Thursday. He was 85.

"He died peacefully here, surrounded by those who love him and have been
caring for him," his wife, Jill Curtis, told The Associated Press outside
their home. "All Tony ever wanted to be was a movie star. He didn't want to
be the most dramatic actor. He wanted to be a movie star, ever since he was
a little kid."

Curtis began acting in frivolous movies that exploited his handsome physique
and appealing personality then steadily moved to more substantial roles,
starting in 1957 in the harrowing show business tale, "Sweet Smell of
Success."

In 1958, "The Defiant Ones" brought him an Academy Award nomination as best
actor for his portrayal of a white racist who escaped from prison handcuffed
to a black man played by Sidney Poitier.

The following year, Curtis donned women's clothing and sparred with Marilyn
Monroe in one of the most acclaimed film comedies ever, Billy Wilder's "Some
Like It Hot."

"He was a fine actor ... I shall miss him," said British actor Roger Moore,
who starred alongside Curtis in TV's "The Persuaders."

"He was great fun to work with, a great sense of humor and wonderful ad
libs," Moore told Sky News. "We had the best of times."

Curtis' first wife was actress Janet Leigh of "Psycho" fame; actress Jamie
Lee Curtis is their daughter.

"My father leaves behind a legacy of great performances in movies and in his
paintings and assemblages," Jamie Lee Curtis said in a statement. "He leaves
behind children and their families who loved him and respected him and a
wife and in-laws who were devoted to him. He also leaves behind fans all
over the world."

Curtis struggled against drug and alcohol abuse as starring roles became
fewer then bounced back in film and television as a character actor.

His brash optimism returned, and he allowed his once-shiny black hair to
turn silver.

Again he came back after even those opportunities began to wane, reinventing
himself as a writer and painter whose canvasses sold for as much as $20,000.

"I'm not ready to settle down like an elderly Jewish gentleman, sitting on a
bench and leaning on a cane," he said at 60. "I've got a helluva lot of
living to do."

Actress and activist Marlo Thomas said she was saddened that Curtis' death
so closely followed the Sept. 22 death in Berkeley, Calif., of Eddie Fisher,
a superstar singer of the 1950s.

"Tony Curtis and Eddie Fisher in the same week. It's very sad," said Thomas,
who starred in the late-1960s sitcom "That Girl" and won Emmy, Golden Globe,
Grammy and Peabody awards.

"He was funny, so very funny, very talented and a great spirit," Thomas said
of Curtis. "I found him to be a darling guy."

Curtis perfected his craft in forgettable films such as "Francis," "I Was a
Shoplifter," "No Room for the Groom" and "Son of Ali Baba."

He first attracted critical notice as Sidney Falco, a press agent seeking
favor with a sadistic columnist, played by Burt Lancaster, in the 1957
classic "Sweet Smell of Success."

In her book "Kiss Kiss Bang Bang," film critic Pauline Kael wrote that in
the film, "Curtis grew up into an actor and gave the best performance of his
career."

Other prestigious films followed: Stanley Kubrick's "Spartacus," "The
Vikings," "Kings Go Forth," "Operation Petticoat" and "Some Like It Hot." He
also found time to do a voice acting gig as his prehistoric lookalike, Stony
Curtis, in an episode of "The Flintstones."

"The Defiant Ones" remained his only Oscar-nominated role.

"I think it has nothing to do with good performances or bad performances,"
he told The Washington Post in 2002. "After the number of movies I made
where I thought there should be some acknowledgment, there was nothing from
the Academy.

"My happiness and privilege is that my audience around the world is
supportive of me, so I don't need the Academy."

In 2000, an American Film Institute survey of the funniest films in history
ranked "Some Like It Hot" at No. 1. Curtis — famously imitating Cary
Grant's accent — and Jack Lemmon play jazz musicians who dress up as women
to escape retribution after witnessing a gangland massacre.

Monroe was their co-star, and Curtis and Lemmon were repeatedly kept waiting
as Monroe lingered in her dressing room out of fear and insecurity. Curtis
fumed over her unprofessionalism.

When someone once remarked that it must be thrilling to kiss Monroe in the
film's love scenes, the actor snapped, "It's like kissing Hitler." In later
years, his opinion of Monroe softened, and in interviews he praised her
unique talent.

In 2002, Curtis toured in "Some Like It Hot" — a revised and retitled
version of the 1972 Broadway musical "Sugar," which was based on the film.
In the touring show, the actor graduated to the role of Osgood Fielding III,
the part played in the movie by Joe E. Brown.

After his star faded in the late 1960s, Curtis shifted to lesser roles. With
jobs harder to find, he fell into drug and alcohol addiction.

"From 22 to about 37, I was lucky," Curtis told Interview magazine in the
1980s. "But by the middle '60s, I wasn't getting the kind of parts I wanted,
and it kind of soured me. ... But I had to go through the drug inundation
before I was able to come to grips with it and realize that it had nothing
to do with me, that people weren't picking on me."

He recovered in the early '80s after a 30-day treatment at the Betty Ford
Center.

"Mine was a textbook case," he said in a 1985 interview. "My life had become
unmanageable because of booze and dope. Work became a strain and a struggle.
Because I didn't want to face the challenge, I simply made myself
unavailable."

One role during that era of struggle did bring him an Emmy nomination: his
portrayal of David O. Selznick in the TV movie "The Scarlett O'Hara War," in
1980.

He remained vigorous following heart bypass surgery in 1994, although his
health had declined in recent years.

"Definitely, I still watch his movies," said Roxanne Shannon, a neighbor of
Curtis in the suburban golf course development about 11 miles southeast of
the Las Vegas Strip. "What a handsome man, oh my God, and a great actor."

Jill Curtis, his sixth wife, said Curtis had been hospitalized several times
in recent weeks for treatment of chronic obstructive pulmonary disease and
lung problems she blamed on smoking 30 years ago. She said he recently
returned home, where died in his sleep.

"His heart survived things that Tony would always say would kill an ordinary
man," she said. "This time, his heart was ready to go and ready to be at
peace."

Curtis took a fatherly pride in daughter Jamie's success. They were
estranged for a long period, then reconciled. "I understand him better now,"
she said, "perhaps not as a father but as a man."

He also had five other children. Daughters Kelly, also with Leigh, and
Allegra, with second wife Christine Kaufmann, also became actresses. His
other wives were Leslie Allen, Andrea Savio, Lisa Deutsch and Jill
VandenBerg, whom he married in 1998.

Jill Curtis, 40, operates Shiloh Horse Rescue, a nonprofit refuge for abused
and neglected horses. She said she planned to make arrangements for a public
memorial.

Tony Curtis married Janet Leigh in 1951, when they were both rising young
stars. They divorced in 1963.

"Tony and I had a wonderful time together; it was an exciting, glamorous
period in Hollywood," Leigh, who died in 2004, once said. "A lot of great
things happened, most of all, two beautiful children."

Curtis was born Bernard Schwartz in the Bronx in 1925, the son of Hungarian
Jews who had emigrated to the United States after World War I. His father,
Manny Schwartz, had yearned to be an actor, but work was hard to find with
his heavy accent. He settled for tailoring jobs, moving the family
repeatedly as he sought work.

"I was always the new kid on the block, so I got beat up by the other kids,"
Curtis recalled in 1959. "I had to figure a way to avoid getting my nose
broken. So I became the crazy new kid on the block."

His sidewalk histrionics helped avoid beatings and led to acting in plays at
a settlement house. He also grew to love movies. "My whole culture as a boy
was movies," he said. "For 11 cents, you could sit in the front row of a
theater for 10 hours, which I did constantly."

After serving in the Pacific during World War II and being wounded at Guam,
he returned to New York and studied acting under the G.I. Bill. He appeared
in summer stock theater and on the Borscht Circuit in the Catskills. Then an
agent lined up an audition with a Universal-International talent scout. In
1948, at 23, he signed a seven-year contract with the studio, starting at
$100 a week.

Bernie Schwartz sounded too Jewish for a movie actor, so the studio gave him
a new name: Anthony Curtis, taken from his favorite novel, "Anthony
Adverse," and the Anglicized name of a favorite uncle. After his eighth
film, he became Tony Curtis.

The studio helped smooth the rough edges off the ambitious young actor. The
last to go was his street-tinged Bronx accent, which had become a Hollywood
joke.

Curtis pursued another career as an artist, creating Matisse-like still
lifes with astonishing speed. "I'm a recovering alcoholic," he said in 1990
as he concluded a painting in 40 minutes in the garden of the Bel-Air Hotel.
"Painting has given me such a great pleasure in life, helped me to recover."

He also turned to writing, producing a 1977 novel, "Kid Cody and Julie
Sparrow." In 1993, he wrote "Tony Curtis: The Autobiography."

Rearranged

Someone out there either has too much
spare time or is deadly at Scrabble.

DORMITORY:
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM

PRESBYTERIAN:
When you rearrange the letters:
BEST IN PRAYER

ASTRONOMER:
When you rearrange the letters:
MOON STARER

DESPERATION:When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT

THE EYES:!
When you rearrange the letters:
THEY SEE

GEORGE BUSH:
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE

THE MORSE CODE:
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE COME DOTS

SLOT MACHINES:
When you rearrange the letters:
CASH LOST IN ME

ANIMOSITY:
When you rearrange the letters:
IS NO AMITY

ELECTION RESULTS:
When you rearrange the letters:
LIES - LET'S RECOUNT

SNOOZE ALARMS:
When you rearrange the letters:
ALAS! NO MORE Z 'S

A DECIMAL POINT:
When you rearrange the letters:
IM A DOT IN PLACE

THE EARTHQUAKES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THAT QUEER SHAKE

ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
When you rearrange the letters:
TWELVE PLUS ONE


AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE:

MOTHER-IN-LAW:
When you rearrange the letters:
WOMAN HITLER

Yep! Someone with waaaaaaaaaaay
too much time on their hands! (Probably a son-in-law)

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

1954 : Willie Mays makes catch

On September 29, 1954, Willie Mays, centerfielder for the New York Giants, makes an amazing over-the-shoulder catch of a fly ball hit by Cleveland Indians first baseman Vic Wertz to rob Wertz of extra bases in Game 1 of the 1954 World Series. The catch has gone down as one of the greatest in the history of baseball.

Willie Howard Mays was born May 6, 1931, in Westfield, Alabama. The "Say Hey Kid" learned baseball from his father, who played semi-professionally with a team from his steel mill. Willie joined the steel mill team at age 14, and then began his professional career at 16 with the Birmingham Black Barons of the Negro Southern League. He played home games for the Barons from 1948 to 1950, skipping road trips during the school year so he could attend high school. Upon graduation he was signed by the New York Giants, and made his debut at the Polo Grounds on May 25, 1951. Mays went hitless in his first 12 at-bats, hitting his first big league homer in his 13th. That season, he was named Rookie of the Year and helped the Giants to the National League pennant.

In 1952, Mays was drafted into the Army. The Mays-less Giants barely missed the pennant in 1952, then felt his absence more acutely in 1953, when they finished the season with a 70-84 record.

Upon his return in 1954, the Giants won the National League by five games over their archrivals, the Brooklyn Dodgers, and then met the Indians in the World Series. In the eighth inning of Game 1, with the score tied 2-2 and two runners on base, Indians first baseman Vic Wertz hit a fly ball 440 feet deep into center field. Mays turned, ran and then caught the ball over his shoulder with his back to the infield, before spinning and firing the ball back into the infield to keep the runners from advancing. The catch preserved the tie, and the Giants won the game on a home run by Dusty Rhodes in the 10th inning. When he was asked later about the catch, Mays famously replied, "I don’t rank ‘em, I just catch ‘em." The Giants went on to sweep the 1954 World Series.

Mays was named the National League MVP in 1954, and again in 1965. He played in a record 24 All-Star games, winning the All-Star MVP in 1963 and 1968. He was elected to the Baseball Hall of Fame in 1979. His base running, power, fielding, ability to hit for average and outstanding arm in the outfield made him the prototype "five-tool" player for whom baseball scouts search. Any argument over who deserves the title "greatest baseball player in history" has to include Willie Mays.

A Mouse Looked Through The Crack In The Wall

A mouse looked through the crack in the wall
to see the farmer and his wife open a package.
"What food might this contain?", the mouse wondered.
He was devastated to discover it was a mousetrap.

Retreating to the farmyard,
the mouse proclaimed this warning :
"There is a mousetrap in the house!
There is a mousetrap in the house!"

The chicken clucked and scratched,
raised her head and said, "Mr. Mouse,
I can tell this is a grave concern to you,
but it is of no consequence to me.
I cannot be bothered by it."
The mouse turned to the pig and told him,
"There is a mousetrap in the house!
There is a mousetrap in the house!"

The pig sympathized, but said,
"I am so very sorry, Mr. Mouse,
but there is nothing I can do about it
but pray..
Be assured you are in my prayers."

The mouse turned to the cow and said,
"There is a mousetrap in the house!
There is a mousetrap in the house!"

The cow said, "Wow, Mr. Mouse. I'm sorry for you,
but it's no skin off my nose."

So, the mouse returned to the house,
head down and dejected,
to face the farmer's mousetrap
. . . Alone.. .. .

That very night
a sound was heard throughout the house
-- the sound of a mousetrap catching its prey.

The farmer's wife rushed to see what was caught.
In the darkness, she did not see it.
It was a venomous snake
whose tail was caught in the trap.

The snake bit the farmer's wife.
The farmer rushed her to the hospital.

When she returned home she still had a fever.
Everyone knows you treat a fever
with fresh chicken soup.
So the farmer took his hatchet to the farmyard
for the soup's main ingredient:

But his wife's sickness continued.
Friends and neighbors
came to sit with her
around the clock.
To feed them, the farmer butchered the pig.

But, alas,
the farmer's wife did not get well...
She died.

So many people came for her funeral
that the farmer had the cow slaughtered
to provide enough meat for all of them
for the funeral luncheon.

And the mouse looked upon it all
from his crack in the wall
with great sadness.

So, the next time you hear
someone is facing a problem
and you think it doesn't concern you,
remember ---

When one of us is threatened, we are all at risk.
We are all involved in this journey called life.
We must keep an eye out for one another
and make an extra effort
to encourage one another.

- REMEMBER -
EACH OF US IS A VITAL THREAD
IN ANOTHER PERSON'S TAPESTRY.

OUR LIVES ARE WOVEN TOGETHER
FOR A REASON.

One of the best things to hold onto
In this world is a FRIEND.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

1941 : Ted Williams becomes last player to hit .400

On this day in 1941, the Boston Red Sox's Ted Williams plays a double-header against the Philadelphia Athletics on the last day of the regular season and gets six hits in eight trips to the plate, to boost his batting average to .406 and become the first player since Bill Terry in 1930 to hit .400. Williams, who spent his entire career with the Sox, played his final game exactly 19 years later, on September 28, 1960, at Boston’s Fenway Park and hit a home run in his last time at bat, for a career total of 521 homeruns.

Williams was born on August 30, 1918, in San Diego, and began his major league career with the Red Sox in 1939. 1941 marked Williams' best season. In addition to his .406 batting average--no major league player since him has hit .400--the left fielder led the league with 37 homers, 135 runs and had a slugging average of .735. Also that season, Williams, whose nicknames included "The Splendid Splinter" and "The Thumper," had an on-base percentage of .553, a record that remained unbroken for 61 years, until Barry Bonds achieved a percentage of .582 in 2002.

In 1942, Williams won the American League Triple Crown, for highest batting average and most RBIs and homeruns. He duplicated the feat in 1947. In 1946 and 1949, he was named the American League's Most Valuable Player and in June 1960, he became the fourth player in major league history to hit 500 homers. He was selected to the All-Star team 17 times.

Williams played his last game on September 28, 1960, and retired with a lifetime batting average of .344, a .483 career on-base percentage and 2,654 hits. His achievements are all the more impressive because his career was interrupted twice for military service: Williams was a Marine Corps pilot during World War II and the Korean War and as a result missed a total of nearly five seasons from baseball.

Williams, who was inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame in 1966, managed the Washington Senators (renamed the Texas Rangers in 1972) from 1969 to 1972. In 1984, the Boston Red Sox retired his uniform number (nine). Williams died of cardiac arrest at age 83 on July 5, 2002, in Florida. In a controversial move, his son sent his father’s body to be frozen at a cryonics laboratory.

Monday, September 27, 2010

1999 : Placido Domingo breaks Caruso’s opening-night record at the Metropolitan Opera

On September 27, 1999, operatic tenor Placido Domingo makes his 18th opening-night appearance at the Metropolitan Opera House, breaking an "unbreakable" record previously held by the great Enrico Caruso.

Caruso, of course, was the biggest star the world of opera had ever seen. Following his New York debut with the Metropolitan Opera in 1903, he made opening-night appearances at the Met in 16 of the next 17 years. With his death in 1921, Caruso’s streak stopped at 17—a mark that no other singer even remotely approached for the next 60 years. The Italian bass-baritone Ezio Pinza was the closest challenger to Caruso before Placido Domingo came along, but even Pinza failed to reach double digits, topping out at nine opening nights with the Met over the course of his 22-year career. Even Domingo never thought that Caruso’s record would be broken, much less that he would be the one to break it. "But when I was in my 11th or 12th opening night," he recalled during an interview before his record-setting performance, "somebody asked me, 'Do you realize how close you are to the number of times Caruso opened the Met season?' What can I tell you? I started to think maybe I can do it.''

As a contemporary of the great Luciano Pavarotti, Placido Domingo never enjoyed undisputed status as the greatest tenor of his time. But his far superior stamina and his broader repertoire made him the go-to choice for opening nights at the Met, of which Pavarotti sang only seven. Domingo sang his first opening with the Met in 1971, in Verdi’s Don Carlo, and over the years he sang opening-night parts as diverse as the title role in Verdi’s Otello and Sigmund in Wagner’s Die Walkurie. When he sang at his record-setting 18th opening night on this day in 1999, Domingo did so, appropriately enough, as Canio in Ruggero Leoncavallo’s Pagliacci—a role most closely associated the man whose record he surpassed, Enrico Caruso.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

1971 : Four 20-game winners

On September 26, 1971, Baltimore Orioles pitcher Jim Palmer wins his 20th game of the year, becoming the fourth Orioles pitcher to win 20 games in the 1971 season. This made the 1971 Orioles pitching staff the first since that of the 1920 Chicago White Sox to field four 20-game winners.

The Orioles began the 1971 season as the two-time defending American League champions and the defending World Series champions. The team was led by two Robinsons: outfielder Frank, a two-time MVP and the 1966 winner of the "triple crown" (leading the American League in home runs, runs batted in and batting average), and Brooks, an excellent hitter and one of the best defensive third basemen in baseball history. The team’s impressive defense featured four eventual 1971 Gold Glove winners--shortstop Mark Belanger, second baseman Davey Johnson, center fielder Paul Blair and Brooks Robinson--as well as three pitching aces: Jim Palmer, Dave McNally and Mike Cuellar. To many in baseball, the team, with legendary manager Earl Weaver at the helm, was considered nothing short of unbeatable.

As it turned out, the team was even better than expected thanks to the stellar play of its fourth starting pitcher, the previously unremarkable Pat Dobson. Dobson played so well that he reached the 20-game plateau before Jim Palmer, the most celebrated of the team’s aces and a future Hall of Famer. By the time Palmer took the mound on September 26 against the Cleveland Indians, the Orioles had already clinched the American League East and were readying themselves for a playoff showdown with the Oakland Athletics. Palmer dismantled the Cleveland offense with his typical pinpoint precision and control, giving up only three hits on the way to a 5-0 Oriole victory, for his 20th win of the season.

Palmer ended 1971 with 20-10 record and a 2.71 earned run average, while McNally went 21-5 with a 2.89, Cuellar went 20-9 with a 3.08 and Dobson finished 20-8 with a 2.90. After beating the A’s in the playoffs, the Orioles lost a heartbreaking seven-game World Series to the Pittsburgh Pirates, led by superstar Roberto Clemente.

Saturday, September 25, 2010

1965 : Fifty-nine-year-old Satchel Paige pitches three innings

On September 25, 1965, the Kansas City Athletics start ageless wonder Satchel Paige in a game against the Boston Red Sox. The 59-year-old Paige, a Negro League legend, proved his greatness once again by giving up only one hit in his three innings of play.

Leroy Page was born on July 7, 1906, in Mobile, Alabama. Page’s family changed the spelling of their name to Paige to differentiate themselves from John Page, Leroy’s absent and abusive father. "Satchel" got his nickname as a boy while working as a luggage carrier at the Mobile train station. When he was 12, his constant truancy coupled with a shoplifting incident got him sent to the Industrial School for Negro Children in Mount Meigs, Alabama. It turned out to be a lucky break, as it was there that Paige learned to pitch. After leaving the school, he turned pro.


From 1927 to 1948 Paige served as the baseball equivalent of a hired gun: He pitched for any team in the United States or abroad that could afford him. He was the highest paid pitcher of his time, and he wowed crowds with the speed of his fastball, his trick pitches and his considerable bravado. Just for fun, Paige would sometimes call in his outfield and then strike out the side. From 1939 to 1942, the Kansas City Monarchs paid up for his services and were justly rewarded: Paige led the team to four consecutive Negro American League pennants from 1939 to 1942. In the 1942 Negro League World Series, Satchel won three games in a four-game sweep of the Homestead Grays, led by famed slugger Josh Gibson.


Paige’s contract was bought by Bill Veeck’s Cleveland Indians on July 7, 1948, his 42nd birthday. He made his major league debut two days later, entering in the fifth inning against the St. Louis Browns with the Indians trailing 4-1. He gave up two singles in two innings, striking one man out and inducing one batter to hit into a double play. The Indians lost the game 5-3 in spite of Paige’s contribution. That year Satchel Paige went 6-1 with a solid 2.48 ERA for the World Champion Cleveland Indians and was named to Major League Baseball’s All-Star Team for the American League in 1952 and 1953, when he was 46 and 47 years old respectively.


On September 25, 1965, Paige’s three innings for the Kansas City Athletics made him, at 59 years, 2 months and 18 days, the oldest pitcher ever to play a game in the major leagues. Before the game, Paige sat in the bullpen in a rocking chair while a nurse rubbed liniment into his pitching arm for the entire crowd to see. Any doubts about Paige’s ability were put to rest when he set down each of the Red Sox batters he faced except for Carl Yastremski, who hit a double.


Arguably the greatest pitcher of his era, Paige was inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame in 1971.

Friday, September 24, 2010

1966 : "Last Train To Clarksville" gives the made-for-TV Monkees a real-life pop hit

When producers Bert Schneider and Bob Rafelson conceived a situation comedy called The Monkees in 1965, they hoped to create a ratings success by blurring the line between pop music and television. Instead, they succeeded in obliterating that line entirely when the pop group that began as a wholly fictional creation went on to rival, however briefly, the success of its real-life inspiration, the Beatles. On this day in 1966, the made-for-television Monkees knocked down the fourth wall decisively when their first single, "Last Train To Clarksville" entered the Billboard Top 40.

"Last Train To Clarksville" was written by the team that was also responsible for the theme song of The Monkees, songwriters Tommy Boyce and Bobby Hart. Though Boyce and Hart had been working together in Los Angeles for several years before being asked to write and record the soundtrack for Schneider and Rafelson’s A Hard Day’s Night-inspired pilot, their biggest success to date had been in writing minor hits for Chubby Checker and Paul Revere and the Raiders and in being commissioned to write the theme song for Days Of Our Lives. Their association with The Monkees would end up launching Boyce and Hart on a moderately successful career as performers in the late 1960s and early 1970s. By far their best-known hits, however, were the ones they wrote for the Monkees, including "(I’m Not Your) Steppin’ Stone" and "Last Train To Clarksville."

Just as producers Schneider and Rafelson had reached out to a pair of industry professionals to create the music for the pilot episode of The Monkees, they engaged numerous others to create the other memorable songs in the Monkees’ catalog. Under the musical direction of Don Kirshner, The Monkees featured hits by some of the era’s greatest songwriters, including Neil Diamond, who wrote "I’m A Believer" and "A Little Bit Me, A Little Bit You" (both 1967) and the great husband-and-wife team of Gerry Goffin and Carole King, who wrote "Daydream Believer" (1967). Numerous other Monkees songs were written by such songwriting luminaries as Cynthia Mann and Barry Weill, Harry Nilsson and Carole Bayer Sager and Neil Sedaka.

By the time their third album was released, the real-life Monkees—Davy Jones, Michael Nesmith, Mickey Dolenz and Peter Tork—had taken over creative control of their musical output, including taking on much of the songwriting. Although they would release seven more studio albums, none would contain hits as successful or memorable as the one that gave the group its breakthrough on September 24, 1966.

50s Pop Singer Eddie Fisher Dies At Age 82

LOS ANGELES – Eddie Fisher, whose huge fame as a pop singer was overshadowed
by scandals ending his marriages to Debbie Reynolds and Elizabeth Taylor,
has died. He was 82.

His daughter, Tricia Leigh Fisher of Los Angeles, told The Associated Press
that Fisher died Wednesday night at his home in Berkeley of complications
from hip surgery.

"Late last evening the world lost a true America icon," Fisher's family said
in a statement released by publicist British Reece. "One of the greatest
voices of the century passed away. He was an extraordinary talent and a true
mensch."

The death was first reported by Hollywood website deadline.com.

Fisher's clear dramatic singing voice brought him a devoted following of
teenage girls in the early 1950s. He sold millions of records with 32 hit
songs including "Thinking of You," "Any Time," "Oh, My Pa-pa," "I'm Yours,"
"Wish You Were Here," "Lady of Spain" and "Count Your Blessings."

His fame was enhanced by his 1955 marriage to movie darling Debbie
Reynolds — they were touted as "America's favorite couple" — and the birth
of two children.

Their daughter Carrie Fisher became a film star herself in the first three
"Star Wars" films as Princess Leia, and later as a best-selling author of
"Postcards From the Edge" and other books.

Carrie Fisher spent most of 2008 on the road with her autobiographical show
"Wishful Drinking." In an interview with The Associated Press, she told of
singing with her father on stage in San Jose. Eddie Fisher was by then in a
wheelchair and living in San Francisco.

When Eddie Fisher's best friend, producer Mike Todd, was killed in a 1958
plane crash, Fisher comforted the widow, Elizabeth Taylor. Amid
sensationalist headlines, Fisher divorced Reynolds and married Taylor in
1959.

The Fisher-Taylor marriage lasted only five years. She fell in love with
co-star Richard Burton during the Rome filming of "Cleopatra," divorced
Fisher and married Burton in one of the great entertainment world scandals
of the 20th century.

Fisher's career never recovered from the notoriety. He married actress
Connie Stevens, and they had two daughters. Another divorce followed. He
married twice more.

Edwin Jack Fisher was born Aug. 10, 1928, in Philadelphia, one of seven
children of a Jewish grocer. At 15 he was singing on Philadelphia radio.

After moving to New York, Fisher was adopted as a protege by comedian Eddie
Cantor, who helped the young singer become a star in radio, television and
records.

Fisher's romantic messages resonated with young girls in the pre-Elvis
period. Publicist-manager Milton Blackstone helped the publicity by hiring
girls to scream and swoon at Fisher's appearances.

After getting out of the Army in 1953 following a two-year hitch, hit
records, his own TV show and the headlined marriage to Reynolds made Fisher
a top star. The couple costarred in a 1956 romantic comedy, "Bundle of Joy,"
that capitalized on their own parenthood.

In 1960 he played a role in "Butterfield 8," for which Taylor won an Academy
Award. But that film marked the end of his movie career.

After being discarded by Taylor, Fisher became the butt of comedians' jokes.
He began relying on drugs to get through performances, and his bookings
dwindled. He later said he had made and spent $20 million during his heyday,
and much of it went to gambling and drugs.

In 1983, Fisher attempted a full-scale comeback. But his old fans had been
turned off by the scandals, and the younger generation had been turned on by
rock. The tour was unsuccessful.

He had added to his notoriety that year with an autobiography, "Eddie: My
Life, My Loves." Of his first three marriages, he wrote he had been bullied
into marriage with Reynolds, whom he didn't know well; became nursemaid as
well as husband to Taylor, and was reluctant to marry Connie Stevens but she
was pregnant and he "did the proper thing."

Another autobiography, "Been There, Done That," published in 1999, was even
more searing. He called Reynolds "self-centered, totally driven, insecure,
untruthful, phony." He claimed he abandoned his career during the Taylor
marriage because he was too busy taking her to emergency rooms and cleaning
up after her pets, children and servants. Both ex-wives were furious, and
Carrie Fisher threatened to change her name to Reynolds.

At 47, Fisher married a 21-year-old beauty queen, Terry Richard. The
marriage ended after 10 months. His fifth marriage, to Betty Lin, a
Chinese-born businesswoman, lasted longer than any of the others. Fisher had
two children with Reynolds: Carrie and Todd; and two girls with Stevens:
Joely and Tricia.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Aretha Franklin's Son Severely beaten

DETROIT – Aretha Franklin's son was severely beaten at a gas station in
Detroit, the singing legend's spokeswoman said Tuesday.

Eddie Franklin, who is in his 50s, was attacked Monday night, Gwendolyn
Quinn said in a statement. A witness said two men and a woman may have been
involved in the attack, according to the statement, which did not identify
the witness or address a possible motive.

Quinn told The Associated Press early Tuesday morning she didn't have any
information beyond the written statement.

A woman who was with Franklin told police she went into the gas station and
when she returned, he had been attacked, police spokeswoman Eren Stephens
said. The woman then drove Franklin to a hospital, dropped him off and
headed to a police station to file a report, police said.

Quinn's statement said Franklin was undergoing surgery early Tuesday, but
Detroit police said he wasn't at the hospital when investigators stopped by.

They were told Franklin "walked out on his own," Stephens said.

The AP left multiple messages for Quinn on Tuesday, seeking updated
information. A hospital spokeswoman confirmed someone named Eddie Franklin
was treated there but wasn't able to offer details.

Stephens said it wasn't entirely clear what had happened and investigators
want to talk to Franklin.

"We really need to talk to him, because he's the one who was assaulted," she
said. "We would advise him to come in and make (a report), but it's
voluntary."

Aretha Franklin, 68, known as the Queen of Soul, is one of the most honored
musicians in American history, having won numerous Grammys, the National
Medal of Arts, the Presidential Medal of Freedom and induction into the Rock
and Roll Hall of Fame.

Her hits include "(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman," "Chain of Fools"
and her signature song, "Respect."

Eddie Franklin was considered a suspect in a 2002 arson fire at his mother's
10,000-square-foot suburban Detroit home, but Michigan Attorney General Mike
Cox's office never charged him.

Eddie Franklin's lawyer at the time, William Mitchell III, described him
Tuesday as someone who needs a lot of "support care — people to get him
around from this place to that place" but did not explain exactly what that
meant.

"Mrs. Franklin is very, very, very, very, very protective of him," Mitchell
added.

Eddie Franklin also is a singer, having recorded in the past with his
mother.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

Lovemaking Tips For Seniors

Put on your glasses. Double check that your partner is actually in bed with you.
Set timer for 2 minutes,just in case you doze off in the middle.
Set the mood with lighting. Turn them ALL OFF!
Make sure you put 911 on your speed dial before you begin.
Write partner's name on your hand just in case you can't remember.
Keep extra Polygrip close by so your teeth don't end up under the bed.
Have Tylenol ready just in case you actually complete the act.
Make all the noise you want. The neighbors are deaf too.
If it works, call everyone you know with the good news.
Don't even think about trying it twice.

a senior and his corvette

A Florida senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible
> > out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80
> > mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left.
> > "Amazing!"
> > he thought
> > as he flew down I-75, pushing the pedal to the metal even more.
> >
> > Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw the highway patrol behind
> him,
> > blue lights flashing and siren blaring. "I can get away from him -
> no
> > problem!"
> > thought the elderly speedster as he floored it to 100 mph, then 110,
> > then 120 mph. Suddenly, he thought, "What on earth am I doing? I'm
> > too old for this nonsense!", pulled over to the side of the road and
> > waited for the Trooper to catch up with him.
> >
> > Pulling in behind him, the Trooper walked up to the driver's side
> of
> > the Corvette, looked at his watch and said, "Sir, my shift ends in
> 30
> > minutes.
> > Today is Friday. If you can give me a reason why you were speeding
> > that I've never heard before, I'll let you go."
> >
> > The man, looking very seriously at the Trooper, said, "Years ago,
> my
> > wife ran off with a Florida State Trooper. I thought you were
> > bringing her back."
> >
> > "Have a good day, Sir," said the Trooper.

Saturday, September 18, 2010

7 las vegas bartenders

Seven Las Vegas bartenders were asked if they could
nail a woman's personality based on what she drinks.
Though interviewed separately, they concurred on
almost all counts.

The results:

Drink: Beer
Personality: Causal, low-maintenance; down to earth.
Your Approach: Challenge her to a game of pool.

Drink: Blender Drinks
Personality: Flaky, whiny, annoying; a pain in the
ass.
Your Approach: Avoid her, unless you want to be her
cabana boy.

Drink: Mixed Drinks
Personality: Older, more refined, high maintenance,
has very picky taste; knows EXACTLY what she wants.
Your Approach: You won't have to approach her. If
she's interested, she'll send YOU a
drink..................

Drink: Wine (does not include White Zinfandel)
Personality: Conservative and classy; sophisticated
yet giggles.
Your Approach: Tell her you love to travel and spend
quiet evenings with friends.

Drink: White Zinfandel
Personality: Easy; thinks she is classy and
sophisticated, actually, she has NO clue.
Your Approach: Make her feel smarter than she
is...this should be an easy target.

Drink: Shots
Personality: Likes to hang with frat-boy pals and
looking to get
totally drunk...and naked.
Your Approach: Easiest hit in the joint. You have
been blessed. Nothing to do but wait, however, be
careful not to make her mad.

Drink: Tequila
No explanations required - everyone just KNOWS what
happens there.


THEN, there is the MALE addendum ----
The deal with guys is, as always, very simple and
clear cut:

Domestic Beer: He's poor and wants to get laid.

Imported Beer: He likes good beer and wants to get
laid.

Wine: He is hoping that the wine will give him a
sophisticated image to help him get laid.

Whiskey: He doesn't give a damn about anything but
getting laid.

Tequila: He is thinking he has a chance with the
toothless waitress.

White Zinfandel: He's gay!

pet monkey

A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders
a drink and while he's
drinking, the monkey jumps all around the place. The
monkey grabs some olives
off the bar and eats them. Then he grabs some sliced
limes and eats them.
He then jumps onto the pool table and grabs one of
the billiard balls. To
everyone's amazement, he sticks it in his mouth, and
somehow swallows it whole.

The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you see what
your monkey just did ?


"No, what?"

"He just ate the cue ball off my pool table whole!"

"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy, "he
eats everything in sight
the little bum. Sorry! I'll pay for the cue ball and
stuff."

The guy finishes his drink, pays his bill, pays for
the stuff the monkey
ate and leaves.

Two weeks later the guy is in the bar again, and has
his monkey with him.

He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around
the bar again.


While the man is finishing his drink, the monkey finds
a maraschino cherry on
the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it
out, and eats it. Then the monkey
finds a peanut, and again sticks it up his butt, pulls
it out, and eats it.

The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your
monkey did now?"

"No, what?" replied the man.

"Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry and a peanut up
his butt, pulled it out
and ate it!" said the bartender.

"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy.
"He still eats everything in
sight, but ever since he had to pass that cue ball, he
measures everything first."

Friday, September 17, 2010

LEYENDAS DEL ALCOHOL

En los paquetes de cigarrillos se ven obligadas a advertir a los consumidores sobre el peligro en el consumo excesivo de este producto.

El gobierno está considerando emitir una ley que advierta a los consumidores de bebidas embriagantes del peligro por su consumo en exceso.



Las leyendas propuestas son las siguientes:

ADVERTENCIA: El consumo de alcohol es la causa principal de bailar como pendejo.

ADVERTENCIA: El consumo de alcohol puede causar que diga la misma historia aburrida una y otra vez, hasta que sus amigos quieran agarrarlo a chingadazos hasta cansarse.

ADVERTENCIA: El consumo de alcohol puede llevarlo a pensar que sus ex-novias están realmente desesperadas y deseosas que las llame por teléfono a las cuatro de la mañana.

ADVERTENCIA: El consumo de alcohol puede hacerlo pensar que está susurrando cuando esta gritando como pendejo y escupiendo la cara.

ADVERTENCIA: El consumo de alcohol puede llevarlo a no saber de qué chingados se embarró su pantalón.

ADVERTENCIA: El consumo de alcohol puede hacerlo pensar que es experto en Kung Fu.

ADVERTENCIA: El consumo de alcohol puede causar que por la mañana mire al otro lado de su cama y vea algo escalofriante (cuyo nombre y/o especie no puede recordar.)

ADVERTENCIA: El consumo de alcohol puede crear la ilusión de que te sientas que eres más fuerte, listo y más guapo que un tipo realmente mamadote llamado LATIN LOVER.

ADVERTENCIA: El consumo de alcohol puede llevarlo a pensar que es invisible o que puede traspasar paredes.

ADVERTENCIA: El consumo de alcohol puede realmente PROVOCAR embarazo.

P.D.: No te quedes con esta información, y como yo, mándasela a un amigo ebrio que de verdad aprecies. Te lo sabrá agradecer, y si regresa significa que tienes un círculo de amistades bien
borrachas!!!



Yo no se porqué me mandan estas cosas a mí, si yo ni tomo... jajajajaja!

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Ten Rules For Staying Young

Ten Rules For Staying Young

1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and
height. Let the doctor worry about
them. That is why you pay him/her.

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down. If you
really need a grouch, there are
probably a few dozen of your relatives to do the job.

3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening,
whatever. Just never let the
brain stay idle.

4. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath. Laugh
so much that you can be
tracked in the store by your distinctive laughter.

5. Do not worry about situations beyond your control. God is still on
His throne!

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person who
is with us our entire lives,
is ourselves.

7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it is family, pets,
keepsakes, music, plants,
hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health. If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable,
improve it. If it is beyond
what you can improve, get help.

9. Don't take guilt trips. Shoulder only your own responsibilities.
Then go to the mall, the next
county, a foreign country, but not to guilt. God forgives
and forgets. Go to Him.

10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.
Remember, life is not
measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments
that take our breath away.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

La Sonora Matancera

This remarkable musical institution was founded on 12 January 1924 in the Cuban province of Matanzas by tres guitarist Valentín Cané. A horn-led string and percussion group, they were initially called Tuna Liberal and included guitarist/singer Rogelio Martínez (7 September 1905, Matanzas, Cuba), who became the band’s director, bass player Pablo Vázquez ‘Babú’ (d. 1969) and timbales player Jimagua. Following two name changes (Septeto Soprano and Estudiantina Matancera) and numerous personnel changes, they renamed themselves Septeto Sonora Matancera in late 1926 and relocated to Havana on 12 January 1927, where Caíto (b. Carlos Manuel Díaz Alonso, 8 November 1905, Matanzas, Cuba, d. 27 September 1990, New York, USA; maracas player/third vocalist) joined shortly after the group’s arrival in the capital. (Caíto’s falsetto voz de vieja ‘old woman’s voice’ in the chorus became one of the group’s unique ingredients.) They soon established themselves and performed at many of Havana’s prestigious venues, including the Alhambra Theatre, Galician Centre, Havana Sports Club and the fabled night meccas La Tropical and Marte Y Belona, as well as on several radio stations. Their pioneering use of uniforms was at first ridiculed, but soon became the trend. They were one of Cuba’s first co-operative bands, which helped underpin their internal cohesion and longevity, and have never felt the need for written contracts within their organization.

The group made their recording debut in mid-1928 on RCA - Victor Records. In 1932 they settled for the name La Sonora Matancera (The Matanzas Group). In 1929 timbalero José Rosario Chávez ‘Manteca’ replaced Jimagua. Between 1929 and 1932 they were frequently hired to perform by the Cuban ruler General Gerardo Machado Morales. In 1935, ex-Septeto Nacional member Calixto Leicea (b. 1910, Matanzas, Cuba; trumpeter/composer) replaced the deceased cornet player Ismael Goberna (an early member of the group) as the Sonora’s first trumpeter. Popular singer Bienvenido Granda (b. 30 August 1915, Cuba, d. 9 July 1983, Mexico) joined in the early 40s and remained until disagreements with Martínez obliged him to leave in 1951. Between 1937 and 1939 future mambo popularizer Pérez Prado played piano with the group. In 1942 the Sonora was joined by distinctive piano stylist, composer and arranger Lino Frías (d. April 1983, New York, USA), who retired from the band in July 1977 owing to arthritis; he was followed by the established New York salsa pianist, band leader, arranger, composer and producer Javier Vázquez (b. 8 April 1936, Matanzas, Cuba), a son of early group member Pablo Vázquez ‘Babú’. To compete with other groups (using three trumpets), the Sonora added second trumpeter Pedro Knight (b. 30 September 1921, Cuba, d. 3 February 2007, Los Angeles, California, USA) on 6 January 1944. Knight later married Celia Cruz (b. Celia de la Caridad Cruz Alonso, 21 October 1924, Santa Suarez district, Havana, Cuba, d. 16 July 2003, New Jersey, USA), singer with the group between 1950 and 1965, on 14 July 1962 in Mexico City and retired from the Sonora on 30 April 1967. In 1952 Raimundo Elpidio Vázquez replaced his father Babú on bass. In 1960, Papaíto took over as the Sonora’s timbalero after the death of Manteca. Between 1976 and 1980 Alfredo ‘Chocolate’ Armenteros joined on trumpet.

In addition to Granda and Cruz, over 60 singers (both Cuban and non-Cuban) have worked with them, including:- Daniel Santos (b. Daniel Doroteo de los Santos Betancur, 5 February 1916, Trastalleres, Santurce, San Juan, Puerto Rico, d. 27 November 1992, Ocala, Florida, USA), Myrta Silva (b. 11 September 1923, Arecibo, Puerto Rico, d. 2 December 1987, San Juan, Puerto Rico), Miguelito Valdés (b. 6 September 1910, Belén district, Havana, Cuba, d. 8 November 1978, Bogotá, Colombia), Bobby Capó (b. 1 January 1921, Coamo, Puerto Rico, d. 18 December 1989), Vicentico Valdés (b. 10 January 1921, Cayo Hueso district, Havana, Cuba), Nelson Pinedo (b. 10 February 1928, Barranquilla, Colombia), Alberto Beltrán (b. 5 May 1923, La Romana, Dominican Republic), Carlos Argentino (b. 23 June 1929, Buenos Aires, Argentina), Leo Marini (b. 23 August 1920, Mendoza, Argentina), Celio González (b. 29 January 1924, Camajuanillas, Las Villas, Cuba), Elliot Romero (b. San Juan, Puerto Rico, d. 1990), Justo Betancourt, Wuelfo Gutiérrez (b. Santiago de Las Vegas, Cuba), Yayo El Indio (b. Puerto Rico), Roberto Torres, Jorge Maldonado (b. 24 September 1950, Río Piedras, Puerto Rico), Cali Aleman (b. Nicaragua) and Ismael Miranda.

Their repertoire comprises various Cuban and other Latin rhythms; and over the decades they have possibly recorded about 4, 000 songs for a number of labels, including RCA-Victor, Panart, Seeco/Tropical, Ansonia, Orfeón, Barbaro (part of the Fania family) and Fania. During the 50s the Sonora enjoyed considerable pan-Caribbean and pan-Latin American prominence. In 1957 they went on a major tour of South America. On 15 June 1960 the band left Cuba to fulfil a four-week contract in Mexico, but remained nearly two years and never returned to Cuba. In 1962 they took up permanent residence in New York. The band made an appearance accompanying Celia Cruz in the BBC2 Arena film profile My Name Is Celia Cruz broadcast on 12 February 1988. In June 1989, 13 former lead singers reunited with the Sonora for a series of three concerts to celebrate their 65th anniversary; a recording of their 1 June 1989 concert was issued on the double album Live! From Carnegie Hall: 65th Anniversary Celebration. They made their extremely belated UK debut in November 1993.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

MEN STRIKE BACK

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine
will probably never be able to support you.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
-------------------------------------------------------------------
How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do what she's told.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes
a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Women will never be equal to men until they can
walk down the street with a bald head and a beer
gut, and still think they are sexy.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.

Monday, September 13, 2010

amigos por siempre

lee esto es muy lindo y es verdad

un consejo: (cuidate)

un favor: (nunca cambies)

un deseo: (no me olvides )

una mentira: (no te quiero)

la verdad: (te quiero mucho)

un secreto: (no quiero perder tu CARIÑO Y amistad)

Manda esto a las personas que más quieras incluyendome a mi

(SOLO si me quieres COMO YO A TI)



¿Conoces la relación entre tus dos ojos?
Ellos parpadean juntos, se mueven juntos, lloran juntos, ven las cosas juntos..Aunque nunca, puedan verse el uno al otro... la amistad debe ser exactamente así!
Es posible que no te vea por meses, ni hable contigo.pero tienes que saber que no necesito verte para sentir que estas junto a mi.
Estamos en la semana mundial del mejor amigo.
¿Quién es tu mejor amigo?
Envía este a todos tus amigos. Lo mismo que a mí, si soy uno de ellos. Ve cuántos recibirás de vuelta. Los amigos también dicen:
TE QUIERO MUCHO

Sunday, September 12, 2010

CONTESTADOR DE LLAMADAS TELEFÓNICO DE LOS ABUELOS

- ¡Hola!  
- En este  momento no estamos en casa pero, por favor, déjanos tu mensaje  después de oir  la señal.
    sonora...beeeppp...
-  Si eres uno de nuestros hijos, marca 1

- Si necesitas  que nos quedemos con los niños, marca 2

-  Si necesitas nuestro coche,  marca 3

- Si quieres  que te lavemos y planchemos la ropa,  marca 4

- Si quieres  que los niños duerman en nuestra casa,  marca 5

- Si quieres  que vayamos a buscarlos al colegio,  marca 6

- Si  quieres que preparemos una comida para el domingo,  marca 7

- Si quieres  venir a comer hoy a casa, marca 8

- Si necesitas  dinero, marca 9

- Si eres uno de nuestros amigos,  "puedes hablar"

LIFE AFTER DEATH

"DO YOU BELIEVE IN LIFE AFTER DEATH?" THE BOSS ASKED ONE OF HIS EMPLOYEES.
"YES, SIR," THE NEW EMPLOYEE REPLIED.
"WELL, THEN, THAT MAKES EVERYTHING JUST FINE," THE BOSS WENT ON. "AFTER YOU LEFT EARLY YESTERDAY TO GO TO YOUR GRANDMOTHER'S FUNERAL, SHE STOPPED IN TO SEE YOU!

PALM SUNDAY
IT WAS PALM SUNDAY AND, BECAUSE OF A SORE THROAT, FIVE-YEAR-OLD JOHNNY STAYED HOME FROM CHURCH WITH A SITTER. WHEN THE FAMILY RETURNED HOME, THEY WERE CARRYING SEVERAL PALM BRANCHES. THE BOY ASKED WHAT THEY WERE FOR. "PEOPLE HELD THEM OVER JESUS' HEAD AS HE WALKED BY."
"WOULDN'T YOU KNOW IT," THE BOY FUMED, "THE ONE SUNDAY I DON'T GO, HE SHOWS UP!"

CHILDREN'S SERMON
ONE EASTER SUNDAY MORNING AS THE MINISTER WAS PREACHING THE CHILDREN'S SERMON, HE REACHED INTO HIS BAG OF PROPS AND PULLED OUT AN EGG. HE POINTED AT THE EGG AND ASKED THE CHILDREN, "WHAT'S IN HERE?" "I KNOW!" A LITTLE BOY EXCLAIMED. "PANTYHOSE !! "

SUPPORT A FAMILY
THE PROSPECTIVE FATHER-IN-LAW ASKED, "YOUNG MAN, CAN YOU SUPPORT A FAMILY?"
THE SURPRISED GROOM-TO-BE REPLIED, "WELL, NO. I WAS JUST PLANNING TO SUPPORT YOUR DAUGHTER. THE REST OF YOU WILL HAVE TO FEND FOR YOURSELVES."

FIRST TIME USHERS
A LITTLE BOY IN CHURCH FOR THE FIRST TIME WATCHED AS THE USHERS PASSED AROUND THE OFFERING PLATES.
WHEN THEY CAME NEAR HIS PEW, THE BOY SAID LOUDLY, "DON'T PAY FOR ME DADDY I'M UNDER FIVE."

CLIMB THE WALLS
"OH, I SURE AM HAPPY TO SEE YOU," THE LITTLE BOY SAID TO HIS GRANDMOTHER ON HIS MOTHER'S SIDE. "NOW MAYBE DADDY WILL DO THE TRICK HE HAS BEEN PROMISING US."
THE GRANDMOTHER WAS CURIOUS. "WHAT TRICK IS THAT?" SHE ASKED.
"I HEARD HIM TELL MOMMY THAT HE WOULD CLIMB THE WALLS IF YOU CAME TO VISIT," THE LITTLE BOY ANSWERED.


THE WATER PISTOL
WHEN MY THREE-YEAR-OLD SON OPENED THE BIRTHDAY GIFT FROM HIS GRANDMOTHER, HE DISCOVERED A WATER PISTOL... HE SQUEALED WITH DELIGHT AND HEADED FOR THE NEAREST SINK.
I WAS NOT SO PLEASED.

I TURNED TO MOM AND SAID, "I'M SURPRISED AT YOU. DON'T YOU REMEMBER HOW WE USED TO DRIVE YOU CRAZY WITH WATER GUNS?"
MOM SMILED AND THEN REPLIED..... "I REMEMBER!!"

GRANDMA'S AGE
LITTLE JOHNNY ASKED HIS GRANDMA HOW OLD SHE WAS.
GRANDMA ANSWERED, "39 AND HOLDING."
JOHNNY THOUGHT FOR A MOMENT, AND THEN SAID, "AND HOW OLD WOULD YOU BE IF YOU LET GO?"

Saturday, September 11, 2010

SEPTEMBER 11 2001

At 8:45 a.m. on a clear Tuesday morning, an American Airlines Boeing 767 loaded with 20,000 gallons of jet fuel crashes into the north tower of the World Trade Center in New York City. The impact left a gaping, burning hole near the 80th floor of the 110-story skyscraper, instantly killing hundreds of people and trapping hundreds more in higher floors. As the evacuation of the tower and its twin got underway, television cameras broadcasted live images of what initially appeared to be a freak accident. Then, 18 minutes after the first plane hit, a second Boeing 767--United Airlines Flight 175--appeared out of the sky, turned sharply toward the World Trade Center, and sliced into the south tower at about the 60th floor. The collision caused a massive explosion that showered burning debris over surrounding buildings and the streets below. America was under attack.

The attackers were Islamic terrorists from Saudi Arabia and several other Arab nations. Reportedly financed by Saudi fugitive Osama bin Laden's al Qaeda terrorist organization, they were allegedly acting in retaliation for America's support of Israel, its involvement in the Persian Gulf War, and its continued military presence in the Middle East. Some of the terrorists had lived in the United States for more than a year and had taken flying lessons at American commercial flight schools. Others had slipped into the U.S. in the months before September 11 and acted as the "muscle" in the operation. The 19 terrorists easily smuggled box-cutters and knives through security at three East Coast airports and boarded four flights bound for California, chosen because the planes were loaded with fuel for the long transcontinental journey. Soon after takeoff, the terrorists commandeered the four planes and took the controls, transforming the ordinary commuter jets into guided missiles.

As millions watched in horror the events unfolding in New York, American Airlines Flight 77 circled over downtown Washington and slammed into the west side of the Pentagon military headquarters at 9:45 a.m. Jet fuel from the Boeing 757 caused a devastating inferno that led to a structural collapse of a portion of the giant concrete building. All told, 125 military personnel and civilians were killed in the Pentagon along with all 64 people aboard the airliner.

Less than 15 minutes after the terrorists struck the nerve center of the U.S. military, the horror in New York took a catastrophic turn for the worse when the south tower of the World Trade Center collapsed in a massive cloud of dust and smoke. The structural steel of the skyscraper, built to withstand winds in excess of 200 mph and a large conventional fire, could not withstand the tremendous heat generated by the burning jet fuel. At 10:30 a.m., the other Trade Center tower collapsed. Close to 3,000 people died in the World Trade Center and its vicinity, including a staggering 343 firefighters and paramedics, 23 New York City police officers, and 37 Port Authority police officers who were struggling to complete an evacuation of the buildings and save the office workers trapped on higher floors. Only six people in the World Trade Center towers at the time of their collapse survived. Almost 10,000 other people were treated for injuries, many severe.

Meanwhile, a fourth California-bound plane--United Flight 93--was hijacked about 40 minutes after leaving Newark International Airport in New Jersey. Because the plane had been delayed in taking off, passengers on board learned of events in New York and Washington via cell phone and Airfone calls to the ground. Knowing that the aircraft was not returning to an airport as the hijackers claimed, a group of passengers and flight attendants planned an insurrection. One of the passengers, Thomas Burnett, Jr., told his wife over the phone that "I know we're all going to die. There's three of us who are going to do something about it. I love you, honey." Another passenger--Todd Beamer--was heard saying "Are you guys ready? Let's roll" over an open line. Sandy Bradshaw, a flight attendant, called her husband and explained that she had slipped into a galley and was filling pitchers with boiling water. Her last words to him were "Everyone's running to first class. I've got to go. Bye."

The passengers fought the four hijackers and are suspected to have attacked the cockpit with a fire extinguisher. The plane then flipped over and sped toward the ground at upwards of 500 miles per hour, crashing in a rural field in western Pennsylvania at 10:10 a.m. All 45 people aboard were killed. Its intended target is not known, but theories include the White House, the U.S. Capitol, the Camp David presidential retreat in Maryland, or one of several nuclear power plants along the eastern seaboard.

At 7 p.m., President George W. Bush, who had spent the day being shuttled around the country because of security concerns, returned to the White House. At 9 p.m., he delivered a televised address from the Oval Office, declaring "Terrorist attacks can shake the foundations of our biggest buildings, but they cannot touch the foundation of America. These acts shatter steel, but they cannot dent the steel of American resolve." In a reference to the eventual U.S. military response he declared: "We will make no distinction between the terrorists who committed these acts and those who harbor them."

Operation Enduring Freedom, the U.S.-led international effort to oust the Taliban regime in Afghanistan and destroy Osama bin Laden's terrorist network based there, began on October 7. Although the Taliban is no longer in power, fighting in Afghanistan continues, and Osama bin Laden is still at large.

Friday, September 10, 2010

Doctor Chang

Q: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
A: Your heart only good for so many beats, and that it... Don't waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speeding up heart not make you live longer; it like saying you extend life of car by driving faster. Want to live longer? Take nap.


Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: No, not at all. Wine made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that mean they take water out of fruity bit so you get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made of grain. Bottom up!

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have body and you have fat, your ratio one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio two to one, etc.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No pain...good!

Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU NOT LISTENING! Food are fried these day in vegetable oil. In fact, they permeated by it. How could getting more vegetable be bad for you?!?

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise muscle, it get bigger. You should only be doing sit-up if you want bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy?!? HEL-LO-O!! Cocoa bean! Another vegetable! It best feel-good food around!

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming good for your figure, explain whale to me..

Q: Is getting in shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! 'Round' is shape!
Well... I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.

And remember:

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO-HOO, what a ride!!"

AND.....

For those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies.

1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans..

5. The Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

CONCLUSION:
Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.

1897 : First drunk driving arrest

On this day in 1897, a 25-year-old London taxi driver named George Smith becomes the first person ever arrested for drunk driving after slamming his cab into a building. Smith later pled guilty and was fined 25 shillings.

In the United States, the first laws against operating a motor vehicle while under the influence of alcohol went into effect in New York in 1910. In 1936, Dr. Rolla Harger, a professor of biochemistry and toxicology, patented the Drunkometer, a balloon-like device into which people would breathe to determine whether they were inebriated. In 1953, Robert Borkenstein, a former Indiana state police captain and university professor who had collaborated with Harger on the Drunkometer, invented the Breathalyzer. Easier-to-use and more accurate than the Drunkometer, the Breathalyzer was the first practical device and scientific test available to police officers to establish whether someone had too much to drink. A person would blow into the Breathalyzer and it would gauge the proportion of alcohol vapors in the exhaled breath, which reflected the level of alcohol in the blood.

Despite the invention of the Breathalyzer and other developments, it was not until the late 1970s and early 1980s that public awareness about the dangers of drinking and driving increased and lawmakers and police officers began to get tougher on offenders. In 1980, a Californian named Candy Lightner founded Mothers Against Drunk Driving, or MADD, after her 13-year-old daughter Cari was killed by a drunk driver while walking home from a school carnival. The driver had three previous drunk-driving convictions and was out on bail from a hit-and-run arrest two days earlier. Lightner and MADD were instrumental in helping to change attitudes about drunk driving and pushed for legislation that increased the penalties for driving under the influence of alcohol and/or drugs. MADD also helped get the minimum drinking age raised in many states. Today, the legal drinking age is 21 everywhere in the United States and convicted drunk drivers face everything from jail time and fines to the loss of their driver's licenses and increased car insurance rates. Some drunk drivers are ordered to have ignition interlock devices installed in their vehicles. These devices require a driver to breath into a sensor attached to the dashboard; the car won't start if the driver's blood alcohol concentration is above a certain limit.

Despite the stiff penalties and public awareness campaigns, drunk driving remains a serious problem in the United States. In 2005, 16,885 people died in alcohol-related crashes and almost 1.4 million people were arrested for driving under the influence of alcohol or drugs.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

COSAS

Lo hizo quedar como un rey!
es facil ser generoso con el bolsillo ajeno no?
jajajajaj

MARIDO PERFECTO

Un grupo de hombres esta en el gimnasio de un club y suena un movil.
Uno de ellos contesta: ¿Si?
Mujer: ¿Querido, eres tu? ¡Se oye horrible!

Marido: Hola... Hola!... Hola

Mujer: ¿Estas en el gimnasio?

Marido:¡ Si!

Mujer: Estoy frente a la vidriera de una peletería viendo un abrigo de visón precioso.¿Puedo comprarmelo?

Marido: ¿Y cuanto cuesta?

Mujer: Como 3.000 euros.

Marido: ¡Bueno! Y comprate también un bolso que haga juego, amor mío.

Mujer: Bueno... esteee... resulta que también pase por un concesionario de automóviles y pensaba que ya es hora de cambiar el auto, así que entre y pregunte.¿A que no sabes que? Resulta que tienen un BMW en oferta y es el último que les queda.

Marido: Y de cuanto es esa oferta?

Mujer: Solo 55.000 €...¡Y es divino!

Marido: Buuueno. Compralo, pero que te lo den con todos los extras y si sale un poco mas, como situación excepcional, no me voy a enojar.

Mujer: (viendo que hoy todos sus pedidos 'calaban', decidió arriesgarse):
Cariño...¿Te acuerdas que te conté que mama quería venirse a vivir con nosotros? ¿Te parece bien que la invite por un mes, a prueba, y el mes que viene lo volvemos a hablar?

Marido: Bueeeno esta bien... pero no me pidas nada mas,¿eh?

Mujer: Si, si, esta bien. ¡Ay, cuanto te adoro mi amor!

Marido: ¡Yo también te quiero!. Un besito, mi amor.

Al colgar el teléfono, el hombre mira al grupo y pregunta:

¿ ALGUIEN SABE DE QUIEN ES ESTE MOVIL?

1965 : Sandy Koufax pitches perfect game

On this day in 1965, Los Angeles Dodgers pitcher Sandy Koufax pitches the eighth perfect game in major league history, leading the Dodgers to a 1-0 win over the Chicago Cubs at Dodgers Stadium in Los Angeles.

Sandy Koufax was a talented all-around athlete from Borough Park in Brooklyn, New York. His first love was basketball, and he attended the University of Cincinnati on a basketball scholarship. His impressive left arm, however, attracted the attention of major league ball clubs and in 1954 he was signed by the Brooklyn Dodgers. Despite his promising talent, Koufax won just 36 games to 51 losses from 1955 to 1961, and was incredibly inconsistent, blowing hitters away one game and walking in runs the next. Finally, advice from veteran catcher Norm Sherry turned Koufax around. As Koufax recounted in his autobiography, Sherry told him to "take the grunt out of the fastball." It worked: From 1962 to 1966, Sandy Koufax executed what are arguably the five greatest seasons by a pitcher in baseball history. His newfound control limited his walks from 4.8 per game to just 2.1, and he pitched no-hitters in three consecutive years--1962, 1963 and 1964.

On September 9, 1965, at the peak of his baseball career, Koufax took the mound against fellow lefty Bob Hendley of the Chicago Cubs, and a pitcher’s duel for the ages ensued. The Cubs were held scoreless, while the Dodgers scored just one run, in the fifth inning. Dodger Lou Johnson walked to lead off the inning, and then advanced to second on a sacrifice. He stole third and then scored when the Cubs catcher fumbled one of Hendley’s throws. As it turned out, one run was all Koufax needed to bring home the victory. His fastballs, which seemed to rise as they reached the plate, whizzed past batters. His curveball was typically devastating, buckling batters at the knees, almost always crossing the plate as a strike after following its parabolic path. As he closed in on a perfect game, Koufax faced the middle of the Cubs order. He struck out Ron Santo and Ernie Banks in the eighth before striking out the side in the ninth to secure his first perfect game.

In addition to throwing his first and only perfect game, Koufax struck out a total of 382 batters in 1965, shattering Rube Waddell’s 1904 record by 32. He retired after the 1966 season at just 30 years old because of arthritis in his elbow.

Koufax won three Cy Young Awards (1963, 1965 and 1966), all of them unanimous.

He was elected to the Hall of Fame in 1972. In 2007, the Modi’in Miracle of the Israel Baseball League made the 71-year old Koufax the final pick in the league’s inaugural player draft as a tribute to his legendary career and Jewish heritage.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

1998 : McGwire passes Maris

On September 8, 1998, St. Louis Cardinals slugger Mark McGwire hits his 62nd home run of the year, breaking Roger Maris’ record for most home runs in a single season. McGwire was celebrated as a hero at the time, though allegations that he used performance-enhancing substances have since led some to question the legitimacy of his accomplishments.

McGwire had hit 52 home runs with the Oakland Athletics in 1996 and a combined 58 in 1997 after a mid-season trade to the "red birds" in St. Louis. As the 1998 season began, speculation ran rampant among baseball fans about whether or not McGwire, known as "Big Mac" for his bodybuilder physique, would be able to break the 27-year-old record of 61 home runs in a season. By June, it became clear that both McGwire and Sammy Sosa of the Chicago Cubs were on pace to hit the target, and fans watched intently as the sluggers traded the home-run lead back and forth between them. On August 10, Sosa tied McGwire by hitting his 46th of the season. Nine days later, he took the lead with his 48th homer in a game against McGwire’s Cardinals. It didn’t take long from McGwire to respond: He hit his 49th home run of the year in the 10th inning of the same game.

Finally, on September 7, in front of an exuberant home crowd in St. Louis in a game against their archrival Cubs, McGwire hit his 61st home run to tie the record while Sosa stayed stuck on 58 home runs. The next night, McGwire’s Cardinals again faced Sosa’s Cubs in Chicago. In the fourth inning, with Sosa in right field, McGwire hit his shortest home run of the season, 341 feet into the left-field stands. The slugger was cheered on by Cubs infielders as he circled the bases, and as he crossed home plate, he was greeted by his son, who was serving as a bat boy for the game, before being surrounded by his celebrating teammates. Meanwhile, Sosa ran in from right field to offer his congratulations. After the game, McGwire declared to reporters, "My bat is going to the Hall of Fame alongside Roger Maris' bat--and I'm damn proud of it.''

On September 25, Sosa took over the major league lead and set his own record with his 66th home run. That would be Sosa’s last, while McGwire would hit five more home runs in his final three games to finish the 1998 season with 70 home runs, a record many thought would last longer than Maris’. However, it stood for only three seasons: Barry Bonds of the San Francisco Giants broke it in 2001 on his way to 73 home runs.

McGwire was known to be on androstenedione, a then-legal performance-enhancing supplement, in 1998 but denied using any illegal substances. In 2003, the publication of retired baseball star Jose Canseco’s book Juiced, in which he pointed fingers at a number of well-known baseball players and alleged that he and McGwire had used steroids together, resulted in a firestorm of steroid-related controversy. The U.S. Congress responded by holding a hearing on the subject. By then retired, McGwire’s eyes welled with tears as he repeatedly stated to the committee, "I’m not here to talk about the past." Many disappointed fans saw his refusal to deny outright that he had used performance-enhancing drugs as tantamount to an admission of guilt.

While McGwire was once considered a shoo-in for the Baseball Hall of Fame, he was passed over in 2006-07, his first year of eligibility.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

1813 : United States nicknamed Uncle Sam

On this day in 1813, the United States gets its nickname, Uncle Sam. The name is linked to Samuel Wilson, a meat packer from Troy, New York, who supplied barrels of beef to the United States Army during the War of 1812. Wilson (1766-1854) stamped the barrels with "U.S." for United States, but soldiers began referring to the grub as "Uncle Sam's." The local newspaper picked up on the story and Uncle Sam eventually gained widespread acceptance as the nickname for the U.S. federal government.

In the late 1860s and 1870s, political cartoonist Thomas Nast (1840-1902) began popularizing the image of Uncle Sam. Nast continued to evolve the image, eventually giving Sam the white beard and stars-and-stripes suit that are associated with the character today. The German-born Nast was also credited with creating the modern image of Santa Claus as well as coming up with the donkey as a symbol for the Democratic Party and the elephant as a symbol for the Republicans. Nast also famously lampooned the corruption of New York City's Tammany Hall in his editorial cartoons and was, in part, responsible for the downfall of Tammany leader William Tweed.

Perhaps the most famous image of Uncle Sam was created by artist James Montgomery Flagg (1877-1960). In Flagg's version, Uncle Sam wears a tall top hat and blue jacket and is pointing straight ahead at the viewer. During World War I, this portrait of Sam with the words "I Want You For The U.S. Army" was used as a recruiting poster. The image, which became immensely popular, was first used on the cover of Leslie's Weekly in July 1916 with the title "What Are You Doing for Preparedness?" The poster was widely distributed and has subsequently been re-used numerous times with different captions.

In September 1961, the U.S. Congress recognized Samuel Wilson as "the progenitor of America's national symbol of Uncle Sam." Wilson died at age 88 in 1854, and was buried next to his wife Betsey Mann in the Oakwood Cemetery in Troy, New York, the town that calls itself "The Home of Uncle Sam."

STEINWAY PIANOS

Steinway & Sons was founded in 1853 by German immigrant Henry Engelhard Steinway in a Manhattan loft on Varick Street. Over the next thirty years, Henry and his sons, C. F. Theodore, Charles, Henry Jr., William, and Albert, developed the modern piano. They built their pianos one at a time, applying skills that were handed down from master to apprentice, generation after generation.

Each Steinway grand piano, for example, takes nearly a year to create. Nothing is hurried.

Today, we still build our pianos that way. Each Steinway grand piano, for example, takes nearly a year to create. Nothing is hurried. Even the carefully selected woods employed in the rims, tops, soundboards, and actions cure for months in our yard, kilns and conditioning rooms, until they stabilize at a rigidly specified moisture content.

Steinway is dedicated to the ideal of making the finest pianos in the world. The result is instruments renowned for their unsurpassed quality. Pianos with such superior sound and responsive touch that they enchant the most demanding pianists. And we are preferred overwhelmingly by people who share the joy of playing and owning the finest musical instrument — a joy which can be yours when you bring a Steinway into your life.

Buddy Holly

If you took out a map of the United States and traced a line beginning at New Orleans and running up the Mississippi River to Memphis, the tip of your finger would pass through the very birthplace of rock and roll—a region where nearly every step in its early development took place and where nearly every significant contributor to that development was born. But if the foundation of rock and roll was mostly laid down within 100 miles of the Mississippi River in the mid-1950s, the blueprint for what would follow required the further contributions of a young man born 700 miles to the west on this day in 1936: Charles Harden Holley. Writing and performing under the name Buddy Holly, this Lubbock, Texas, native would have an influence on rock and roll that would far outlast his tragically shortened career.

Buddy Holly spent his west Texas youth learning the piano, the violin, the banjo and the guitar. He formed his first group while still in junior high school. Performing as Buddy & Bob, Holly and his school friend Bob Montgomery played what they called "western and bop"—one of the many creative names used in the mid-1950s to describe the various hybrids of blues, R&B and country & western that would later coalesce into rock and roll. When Buddy & Bob opened in Lubbock for a young kindred spirit named Elvis Presley in 1955, Holly saw very clearly in what direction he wanted to go. And while Holly would never be able to compete with Presley in terms of good looks and charisma, he would far outdo Elvis in terms of purely musical creativity.

By 1956, Elvis had become a superstar performing material originally written by others, and though Buddy Holly was still an unknown, he was blazing a trail that future giants like the Beatles would follow by writing, performing and eventually producing his own material. Both the Beatles and the Rolling Stones would draw heavily on the Buddy Holly catalog either for cover material or direct songwriting inspiration, and Holly would be a tremendous formative influence on the young Bob Dylan, among many others.

In a recording career that lasted little more than 18 months, Holly contributed an astonishing number of classic songs to the rock-and-roll canon, including "That’ll Be The Day," "Peggy Sue," "Not Fade Away," It’s So Easy," "Everyday," "Oh Boy!" and "Maybe Baby." Born on this day in 1936, he died in 1959 at the age 23 in rock and roll’s most famous plane crash.

Monday, September 6, 2010

1995 : Ripken breaks record for consecutive games played

On this day in 1995, Baltimore Orioles shortstop Cal Ripken Jr. plays in his 2,131st consecutive game, breaking "Iron Horse" Lou Gehrig’s record for most consecutive games played. "The Iron Man" was credited with reviving interest in baseball after a 1994 work stoppage forced the cancellation of the World Series and soured fans on the national pastime.

Ripken’s father, Cal Sr., was a former minor league journeyman catcher who, along with his wife Vi, instilled the "perfect practice makes perfect" philosophy in Cal and his younger brother Billy. Cal was a high school pitcher and shortstop for Aberdeen High School in Maryland while his father coached for Manager Earl Weaver’s Orioles, one of the most successful teams in baseball from the 1960s through the early 80s. Cal Jr. often got to take infield with the team, and learned the tricks of the trade from the best in the business. In 1978, the O’s made Cal their second-round pick in the amateur draft. He made his major league debut three years later, and on May 30, 1982, began a streak of consecutive games played that would last 17 seasons. Later that year, Weaver switched the 6’4" Ripken from third base to shortstop, a position that was at the time typically played by smaller men. Ripken’s quickness and great baseball instincts made him a natural, and his success redefined the shortstop archetype. Ripken was named Rookie of the Year in 1982 and American League MVP in 1983 and 1991.

On September 6, 1995, 13 and a half seasons and 2,131 games into his streak, Ripken took his familiar position at shortstop. President Bill Clinton, Vice President Al Gore, baseball legend Joe DiMaggio and Ripken’s family were among the notables in attendance. In the fourth inning, Ripken ripped a 3-0 fastball from California Angels pitcher Shawn Boskie into the left-field stands, touching off a celebration from the Baltimore faithful, and inspiring even President Clinton to pump his fists in the stands. When the fifth inning began and the game became official, the Orioles unfurled a banner that read 2131 on the brick wall of the B & O Warehouse overlooking right field as camera flashes lit the night. Ripken emerged from the dugout and doffed his cap to thank the crowd, but the celebration in the stands continued. Teammates urged Ripken once again onto the field, where he took a spontaneous victory lap, shaking hands with Orioles fans around the stadium.

Ripken went on to play 2,632 games in a row before ending the streak by voluntarily removing himself from a game against the New York Yankees on September 19, 1998.

Ripken retired after the 2001 season with the lifetime record for home runs by a shortstop (345) and a record for fielding percentage by a shortstop in a season (.9956, 1990). He played in 19 All-Star Games, and was awarded the All-Star MVP in 1991 and in his last All-Star Game in 2001, in which he hit a solo home run. He was elected to the Baseball Hall of Fame in 2007. A record 75,000 fans attended his induction ceremony.

Talking Dog

A guy is driving around Tennessee and he sees a sign in front of a house:
"Talking Dog For Sale." He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes into the backyard and sees a Labrador retriever sitting there.

"You talk?" he asks.

"Yep," the Lab replies.

"So, what's your story?"

The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA about my gift, and in no time at all they had me jetting from country to country,

sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running."

"But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security wandering near suspicious characters and

listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals."

"I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired."

The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.

"Ten dollars," the guy says.

"Ten dollars? This dog is amazing. Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?"

"Because he's a liar. He never did any of that shit."

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Why, Why, Why

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?

Why do banks charge a fee for "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four bil- lion stars but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

And my FAVORITE......

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.

1972 : Israeli athletes killed at Munich Olympics

On this day in 1972, at the Summer Olympics in Munich, Germany, a group of Palestinian terrorists storms the Olympic Village apartment of the Israeli athletes, killing two and taking nine others hostage. The terrorists, known as Black September, demanded that Israel release over 230 Arab prisoners being held in Israeli jails and two German terrorists. In an ensuing shootout at the Munich airport, the nine Israeli hostages were killed along with five terrorists and one West German policeman. Olympic competition was suspended for 24 hours to hold memorial services for the slain athletes.

After being founded in 776 B.C. in ancient Greece, the first modern Olympics were held in Athens in 1896, with 13 countries and 311 athletes competing. The games were meant to foster peace and bring people together. Germany had hoped that the 1972 Olympics would be a celebration of peace, as it was the first time it had hosted the games since 1936, when Adolf Hitler, who used the games to promote his Aryan master race theory, was in power.

The Munich Olympics opened on August 26, 1972, with 195 events and 7,173 athletes representing 121 countries. On the morning of September 5, Palestinian terrorists in ski masks ambushed the Israeli team. After negotiations to free the nine Israelis broke down, the terrorists took the hostages to the Munich airport. Once there, German police opened fire from rooftops and killed three of the terrorists. A gun battle erupted and left the hostages, two more Palestinians and a policeman dead.

After a memorial service was held for the athletes at the main Olympic stadium, International Olympic Committee President Avery Brundage ordered that the games continue, to show that the terrorists hadn't won. Although the tragedy deeply marred the games, there were numerous moments of spectacular athletic achievement, including American swimmer Mark Spitz's seven gold medals and teenage Russian gymnast Olga Korbut's two dramatic gold-medal victories.

In the aftermath of the murders at the '72 Olympics, the Israeli government, headed by Golda Meir, hired a group of Mossad agents to track down and kill the Black September assassins. In 2005, Steven Spielberg made a movie, Munich, about these events.

Saturday, September 4, 2010

Smart ass answers

Answer #5:

A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets.
As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened
his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat....she said,
"Sir, I need to see your ticket not your stub."

Smart Ass Answer #4:

A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but
she couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy,
"Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am,
they're dead."

Smart Ass Answer #3:

The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding
rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day," the cop
said.

The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could." When the
cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a
ticket.

Smart Ass Answer #2:

A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that
reads, "Low Bridge Ahead." Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead
of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles.


Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks to
the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?"

The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of
gas."


#1 SMART ASS ANSWER OF THE YEAR 2006
A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. "Now
class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I
might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness,
or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses
whatsoever!"

A smart ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What
would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter
sexual exhaustion?" The entire class is reduced to laughter and
snickering. When silence was restored, the teacher smiled knowingly at
the student. Shaking her head she said, "Well, I guess you'll have to
write with your other hand."

Friday, September 3, 2010

ISLAM

The literal meaning of Islam is peace; surrender of one’s will i.e. losing oneself for the sake of God and surrendering one’s own pleasure for the pleasure of God. The message of Islam was revealed to the Holy Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings on him) 1, 400 years ago. It was revealed through angel Gabriel (on whom be peace) and was thus preserved in the Holy Quran. The Holy Quran carries a Divine guarantee of safeguard from interpolation and it claims that it combines the best features of the earlier scriptures.

The prime message of Islam is the Unity of God, that the Creator of the world is One and He alone is worthy of worship and that Muhammad (peace and blessings on him) is His Messenger and Servant. The follower of this belief is thus a Muslim - a Muslim’s other beliefs are: God’s angels, previously revealed Books of God, all the prophets, from Adam to Jesus (peace be on them both), the Day of Judgement and indeed the Decree of God. A Muslim has five main duties to perform, namely; bearing witness to the Unity of God and Muhammad (peace and blessings on him) as His Messenger, observing the prescribed prayer, payment of Zakat, keeping the fasts of Ramadhan and performing the pilgrimage to Mecca.

Islam believes that each person is born pure. The Holy Quran tells us that God has given human beings a choice between good and evil and to seek God’s pleasure through faith, prayer and charity. Islam believes that God created mankind in His image and by imbuing the attributes of God on a human level mankind can attain His nearness. Islam’s main message is to worship God and to treat all God’s creation with kindness and compassion. Rights of parents in old age, orphans and the needy are clearly stated. Women’s rights were safeguarded 1,400 years ago when the rest of the world was in total darkness about emancipation. Islamic teachings encompass every imaginable situation and its rules and principles are truly universal and have stood the test of time.

In Islam virtue does not connote forsaking the bounties of nature that are lawful. On the contrary one is encouraged to lead a healthy, active life with the qualities of kindness, chastity, honesty, mercy, courage patience and politeness. In short, Islam has a perfect and complete code for the guidance of individuals and communities alike. As the entire message of Islam is derived from the Holy Quran and indeed the Sunnah and Hadith (the traditions and practices of the Holy Prophet, peace and blessings on him) it is immutable in the face of change in time and place. It may appear rigid to the casual eye, in actual fact it is most certainly an adaptable way of life regardless of human changes.

Islam teaches that the path to spiritual development is open to all. Any individual who searches the One Creator can seek nearness to God through sincere and earnest worship; it is central to establishing a relationship with the Almighty. This positive message for humanity fills hearts with hope and courage.

At present there are 1.5 billion Muslims worldwide and they form the majority in more than 50 countries of the world. Today Islam is the fastest growing faith in the world - its beautiful message is reaching millions in the far corner of the earth.