16 years old

A woman pregnant with triplets was walking down the street when a masked
robber ran out of a bank and shot her three times in the stomach.
Luckily the babies were OK. The surgeon decided to leave the bullets in
because it was too risky to operate. She gave birth to two healthy
daughters and a healthy son. All was fine for 16 years, and then one
daughter walked into the room in tears.
"What's wrong?" asked the mother.

"I was taking a tinkle and this bullet came out," replied the daughter.
The mother told her it was okay and explained what happened 16 years ago.

About a week later the second daughter walked into the room in tears.
"Mom, I was taking a tinkle and this bullet came out."

Again the mother told her not to worry and explained what happened 16
years ago.

A week later her son walked into the room in tears.
"It's okay" said the Mom, "I know what happened.
You were taking a tinkle and a bullet came out."
"No," said the boy, "I was playing with myself and I shot the dog."

A FRIEND

One day, when I was a freshman in high school,

I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school.

His name was Kyle.

It looked like he was carrying all of his books.

I thought to myself, "Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday?

He must really be a nerd."

I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on.

As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him.

They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt.

His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him.

He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes

My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye.

As I handed him his glasses, I said, "Those guys are jerks. "

They really should get lives.

" He looked at me and said, "Hey thanks!"

There wa s a big smile on his face.

It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.

I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived.

As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked h im why I had never seen him before.

He said he had gone to private school before now.

I would have never hung out with a private school kid before.

We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books.

He turned out to be a pretty cool kid.

I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my friends

He said yes.

We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.

Monday morning came! , and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again.

I stopped him and said, "Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!

" He just laughed ! and handed me half the books.

Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends.

When we were seniors, we began to think about college.

Kyle decided on Georgetown , and I was going to Duke.

I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never be a problem.

He was going to be a doctor, and I was going for business on a football scholarship.

Kyle was valedictorian of our class.

I teased him all the time about being a nerd.

He had to prepare a speech for graduation.

I was so glad i t wasn't me having to get up there and speak

Graduation day, I saw Kyle.

He looked great.

He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school.

He filled out and actually looked good in glasses.

He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him.

Boy, sometimes I was jealous!
Today was one of those days.

I could see that he was nervous about his speech.

So, I smacked him on the back and said, "Hey, big guy, you'll be great!"

He loo ked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled.

" Thanks," he said.

As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began

"Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years.

Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach...but mostly your friends...

I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them.

I am going to tell you a story."

I just looked at my friend with dis belief a s he told the story of the first day we met.

He had planned to kill himself over the wee ken d.

He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home.

He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile.

"Thankfully, I was saved.

My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable."

I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment.

I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile.

Not until that moment did I realize it's depth.

Never underestimate the power of your actions.

With one small gesture you can change a person's life.

For better or for worse.

God puts us all in each others lives to impact one another in some way.

Look for God in others.

You now have two choices, you can:

1) Pass this on t o your friends or

2) Delete it and act like it didn't touch your heart.

As you can see, I took choice number 1.
"Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly."

There is no beginning or end.. Yesterday is history.

Tomorrow is a mystery.

Today is a gift.

Aprendiendo a contar

Bueno niños hoy vamos a tener una prueba diferente, os voy a escribir un número en la pizarra y vosotros, a través de una canción, tendréis que hacer una suma y darme el resultado escrito en la pizarra.
¿Queda claro?" - pregunta la profesora.
-"Sííííííí" - contestan todos.
Jaimito piensa: - "se me está poniendo difícil esta situación".
-"A ver Luisito, pase usted."
La maestra escribe el número 16 en la pizarra. "Tienes 10 segundos para contestar, comienza el tiempo"
-"Señorita, lo tengo: 2 y 2 son 4, 4 y 2 son 6, 6 y 2 son 8 y 8, 16".
-" ¡Muy bien! -"¡Muy bien!" dice la profesora. Le toca el turno a Jaimito y la profesora con una sonrisota y cara de sobrada piensa: "ahora si que te voy a joder", y le escribe el 23 en la pizarra.
A los 9 segundos Jaimito dice: -"Señorita, ¿puedo rapear?"
-"¿Rapear?" - pregunta la profesora. Y losdemas niños empiezan:
-"Que rapee!! Que rapee!! Que rapee!!!"
-"Bien" - dice la profesora. Y comienza Jaimito su melodía... -"La fuckingprofesora me intenta joder ... con una sumatoria que debo resolver. Los dedos de mis manos, los dedos de mis pies, la polla y los cojones....¡¡¡Suman veintitrés!!!

LITTLE LARRY

A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, 'Everyone who thinks they're stupid, stand up!' After a few seconds, Little Larry stood up. The teacher said, 'Do you think you're stupid, Larry?' 'No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!'

Larry watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her face. 'Why do you do that, mommy?' he asked. 'To make myself beautiful,' said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue. 'What's the matter, asked Larry 'Giving up?'

The math teacher saw that Larry wasn't paying attention in class. She called on him and said, 'Larry! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?' Larry quickly replied, 'NBC, FOX, ESPN and the Cartoon Network!'

Larry's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of the 10 most wanted criminals. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person. 'Yes,' said the policeman. 'The detectives want very badly to capture him. Larry asked,"Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture ? "

Little Larry attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse's legs and rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Larry asked, 'Dad, why are you doing that?' His father replied, 'Because when I'm buying horses, I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy. Larry, looking worried, said, 'Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom.

1975 : A New York judge reverses John Lennon's deportation order

On this day in 1975, a New York State Supreme Court judge reverses a deportation order for John Lennon, allowing him to remain legally in his adoptive home of New York City.

Protests against the Vietnam War had escalated significantly following the announcement of the Cambodia invasion on April 30, 1970, and the shooting deaths of four student protestors at Kent State just four days later. Many such gatherings would feature peaceful demonstrators singing Lennon's 1969 anthem "Give Peace A Chance," but others were more threatening. Newly relocated to New York City, John Lennon began to associate publicly with such radical figures as Abbie Hoffman, Jerry Rubin and Bobby Seale, and the White House reportedly grew concerned, according to the 2006 documentary The U.S. vs. John Lennon, over his potentially powerful influence with a generation of 18-to-20-year-olds who would be allowed, for the very first time, to vote in the 1972 presidential election. "I suppose if you were going to list your enemies and decide who is most dangerous," Walter Cronkite would later say, "if I were Nixon, I would put Lennon up near the top."

South Carolina Senator Strom Thurmond was of the same opinion, and it was a letter he wrote to the White House in his capacity as Chairman of the Senate Internal Security Committee that prompted the White House to action. An FBI investigation of Lennon turned up no evidence of involvement in illegal activities, but the matter was referred nonetheless to the Immigration and Naturalization Service, which began deportation proceedings against Lennon and his wife, Yoko Ono, on the basis of a 1968 marijuana conviction in England.

Leon Wildes, the immigration attorney who would handle Lennon's case over the next four-plus years, would say of his client's reaction to the case, "He understood that what was being done to him was wrong. It was an abuse of the law, and he was willing to stand up and try to show it—to shine the big light on it." Lennon's persistence in fighting the case finally paid off on October 7, 1975, with a court decision that left no question as to the real motives behind the deportation: "The courts will not condone selective deportation based upon secret political grounds," wrote Judge Irving Kaufman, who also went on to say, "Lennon's four-year battle to remain in our country is testimony to his faith in this American dream."

Less than one year later, in June 1976, John Lennon got his green card.

1926 : Babe Ruth sets a World Series record

On October 6, 1926, Yankee slugger Babe Ruth hits a record three homers against the St. Louis Cardinals in the fourth game of the World Series. The Yanks won the game 10-5, but despite Ruth’s unprecedented performance, they lost the championship in the seventh game. In 1928, in the fourth game of another Yanks-Cards World Series, Ruth tied his own record, knocking three more pitches out of the same park.

The 1926 championship promised to be an exciting one. The AL champs had a powerful lineup, later called the "Murderer’s Row," that included the great Babe, the young "Columbia Lou" Gehrig, and the leadoff man Earle Combs. For their part, the Cardinals had the intimidating Rogers Hornsby along with ace pitchers Flint Rhem and Bill Sherdel.

But the Yanks were heavily favored, and they won the first game easily. They lost the second, though, thanks to an outstanding full-game performance from St. Louis pitcher Grover Cleveland Alexander. The next day, Cardinal Jessie Haines pitched the whole game--and hit the only home run--in his team’s 4-0 Game 3 victory.

By the fourth game in the series, the underdog Cards were up two games to one. The Yanks needed to pull it together, and for one game, they did. Veteran Waite Hoyt pitched all nine innings while St. Louis shuffled through its entire bullpen. And the Babe--the Sultan of Swat, the Caliph of Clout, the Wali of Wallop--hit his three homers and led the Yanks to a 10-5 victory. Unfortunately for the Bombers, that game didn’t decide the series. Though they won the next game in 10 innings, they lost the next one by eight runs. And they were losing the seventh game by one run in the ninth inning when the Bambino stepped to the plate again. With a 3-2 count, Ruth drew his eleventh walk of the series and trotted off to first base. The Yanks’ hopes plummeted as quickly as they’d risen, though, when second baseman Hornsby nabbed him as he tried somewhat ploddingly to steal second. The game was over. Thanks to the magical Bambino, the Bombers had lost.

On October 18, 1977, Yankee Reggie Jackson became only the second player to hit three homers in a single Series game.

1953 : Yanks win their fifth series in a row

On October 5, 1953, the New York Yankees defeat the Brooklyn Dodgers to win their fifth World Series in a row. It was a record-breaking championship: Joe McCarthy’s legendary 1936-1939 Yanks had won four in a row, but no team had ever won five. The Bombers had squeaked by the Bums in Game 7 the previous year, and everyone thought that the Brooklyn team--powered by amazing pitching and a taste for revenge--would be back to claim the title. But instead, they lost for the seventh time in as many chances, and their cross-town rivals made World Series history.

More than anyone else, the 1953 series belonged to second baseman Billy Martin. At the beginning of the first game, he cracked a three-run triple and added three more hits on the way to a 9-5 Yankee victory. In the second, Martin hit a game-tying homer in the seventh inning, paving the way for Mickey Mantle’s two-out two-run blast in the eighth. The Bombers won that game 4-2. The Dodgers won the third game, thanks to pitcher Carl Erskine’s series-record 14 strikeouts. They won the fourth, too, but lost their momentum in Game 5: The Yankees had 25 hits; Martin homered again; and Mantle hit a grand slam (only the fourth in championship history) into the upper deck of the left-field stands.

In the ninth inning of the sixth game, the unfortunate Dodgers were losing 3-1. Then, with one out, Duke Snider walked; after that, Carl Furillo clobbered a run into the right-field stands. The game was tied. But in the bottom of the inning, Yankee Hank Bauer walked to first and made it to second on an infield single from Mantle. Then, the irrepressible Martin--who batted .500 in the series with 12 hits in all (a double, two triples, two homers and 8 RBIs)--stepped to the plate. He singled to center, sending Bauer home and winning the game.

On the same day in 2001, in the first inning of a game at San Francisco’s Pac Bell Park, Giant Barry Bonds hit his 71st home run, breaking the record Mark McGwire had set three years before. He hit another homer off the same pitcher--L.A. Dodger Chan Ho Park--in the third. Two nights later, he hit his last bomb of the season. His record still stands.